why people won't just do the f*#king thing [idgaf 009]

Real talk Reader,

Imagine you're sitting there talking to a prospective client. They're telling you what's going on, and you know what you do will absolutely change their lives (for the better obv). There's very clear value, so you know your fees aren't a problem.

But when it comes time to sign, they.. ghost? Or just make up some excuse? WHYYYyyyYYYyyyyYYYyyyy?

This used to really chap my cheeks when I was a business coach. Not just to get someone signed up, but also when I was trying to get my clients to implement changes in their lives. At least it did until I figured out why it was happening (imagine my smug face as I say that). So pull up a chair! Unless you're in a chair already. Or maybe you're reading this while standing. I dunno. Just read on and enjoy!

ps. I'm intending this email to be way shorter than usual, so let's see how I go with that!

One of my own coaches taught me this sweet little concept (over 10 years ago now wtf) that my poor naive brain had never considered.

For people to take action, to change something, they need a few things - kinda like a formula. And if we want to inspire them to make that change, part of our job is to help them get clear on all this stuff (or at least make sure they all exist).

So what's first?

The easiest thing to find out: what do they actually want? What's the desired outcome or result? Cause if they don't want anything, theres nothing to change to. Ideally what they want is what your service will make happen. If not, you're gonna struggle to get them to sign the contract.

And it hopefully goes without saying (but I'll say it anyway), the more they want something, the more likely they'll take action.

If life's pretty good, you don't have that much incentive to change anything. No matter how amazing that potential situation is.

Same deal with your prospects. Part of your sales conversation should be figuring out what's shitty about their current existence. The further their vision is from their current situation, and the the more dissatisfied they are with it, the more motivated they'll be to change things.

Sidebar: it's why scammers end up tricking the desperate so easily. So I guess please don't use this knowledge to scam desperate people?

Anyway, they have a vision of the future, and they're unhappy enough about their current situation. But we can't celebrate yet, cause we're missing something. aNd yOu'LL NeVeR GuEsS WhAt iT iS (unless you read the next line, or already know, or maybe you just guess cause it's not really rocket science, anyway clickbait is dumb).

We're missing:

Imagine you want to get fit and buff and all that good stuff, so you decide to start working out like some sort of barbarian. If you said "okay I need to figure out my ideal workout routine based on my current caloric intake and desired goals, make sure I have appropriate clothes to wear, find the right gym to join based on convenience and price, and..." yeahhhh that plan is bust. That's so intimidating!

Buuuuut if instead you said "yeah I'm gonna head down to the gym tomorrow and sign up" you'd probably have a lot more luck with it, cause that doesn't sound so bad.

I bet if we looked at how many deals fell through because someone made that sign up process complex AF, the number would be MASSIVE. For people to make a change, their first step needs to be easy. The easier, the better.

If they're already dissatisfied with their current meagre existence, have a vision of this amazing dream life, but they don't have an easy first step? It's kinda like being constipated, except with life. Lubricate that first step if you want to splatter that change all over the place. Wow I'm so sorry.

Without ALL of these things, we'll never overcome......

Yeah! Everyone (EVEN YOU) has some resistance to change.

Sometimes the resistance is heavy, sometimes it's light AF, but it's always there.

The stronger you dig into each of the parts of the formula, the more likely you are to overcome it. If you miss any one part, the chance of that change happening is lower than the chance of one of my emails being short and sweet (fml).

Of course, just cause every piece is there and change is definitely happening, doesn't mean it's happening with you (that's a whole other email).

To get someone to change, their Vision x Dissatisfaction x First step all together has to be strong enough to overcome the Resistance to that change.

This totally explains why sometimes coaching clients (or prospects) wouldn't do something that seemed like an absolute no brainer to me, and might explain why sometimes you get prospects ghosting when you know you'd legit have a huge positive impact on their lives.

And unexpectedly, it's also super helpful knowledge when you're the one not doing the thing (I've managed to gaslight myself into doing good things for myself by following the formula).

Anyway, this email wasn't that long was it?

Cowabunga,Nick Gulic